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Why Materialistic?

"I want a gold-plated toilet seat, honey!"
"Do you need toilet paper made of money?"
 
After reading S'pore girls are materialistic: SMU Study , I have to agree with the content to a certain extent. Though I am not saying that it is representative of all girls in Singapore. There are many reasons as to why girls in Singapore are being or becoming more materialistic (in other words, choosing "a man's social status as the top criterion.")


The following are issues I have personally identified:-

#1: Capability - "If I can afford so many things on my own, why do I need a man who is less competent than me who can’t even buy me a Louis Vuitton wallet?" says the pro-feminist or feminist;

#2: "Security" - If one day she decides to be a homemaker/(tai tai), her man would be able to provide for the family or if one day she decides that she cannot remained "bound" to her man by marriage, he could afford to compensate her accordingly;

#3: Cultural - This is especially true in Asian context: the parents of the girl would want for their daughter to have a spouse who can provide for her a better (more/equally luxurious) kind of life; this is particularly true if she is already from a well to do family background);

#4: Societal - He can be a trophy husband to show off superficially to friends and relatives;

#5: Media portrayal - If the parents are both rich and successful, they are more likely to nurture a just as what society would deem as a successful individual. (I would like to quote Donald Trump as an example here; his father was a builder and real estate developer.);

#6: Acceptance - Are men really ready to accept a women who is socially regarded as more successful than them gracefully? (There may/may not be a role reversal here but wouldn't men in this circumstance find themselves less accomplished?);

#7: Mindset - Women want men to pamper them by purchasing expensive and tangible things. (But honestly, who doesn't love being pampered? Even men find pleasure in being pampered. To a certain extend, I believe that some women think that making love [offering sex] is priceless. I have to agree that it is naturally sacred and precious, however, in a marriage life, a couple should not separately debit or credit their partner’s “performance accounts” based on what each party has/has not done but to love each other unconditionally.);

Ultimately, I believe the key to having a happy and long-lasting marriage are to:-

a) Understand what marriage is all about;


b) Identify both parties values, needs etc (share about it and be committed to do your part in the relationship);


c) Love yourself and love your partner wholeheartedly; and


d) Be a cheerful and willing giver.

Money is not everything though you need it for survival in today's world. Having said that, you can use your talent(s) and skills to achieve (wealth)/a comfortable life, without having to depend on anybody to maintain your (lavish) lifestyle.

Pam Petite
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