*time to grow up*

today i got smack back to reality...
it was kind of agonizing...
i was reminded that i couldn't take forever to decide whether i want to continue with my job or otherwise...
my colleague asked me a couple of questions which determined my fate...
i'm jobless...
officially...
i was in low spirit...
but not for long...

~

i don't understand why harsh but truthful words are not expressed right before me...
i would be able to take it...
because usually i must have done something wrong to deserve that form of 'treatment'...
i don't like it when others communicate important things via email, msn or sms...
i must admit that i use these modes sometimes...
and i really probably should not use it in the future as there would be lots of misinterpretations...
today i wonder why must bad stuffs happen before my birthday...
somehow, i think i deserve it...

~
watched oprah winfrey's show...
brought tears to my eyes...
finally, a reason to cry...
nate, an interior designer lost his good friend...
i don't know how life would be without the people i truly cherish...
i felt for him...

~

had dinner with my best friend...
shared with her what's been happening in my life...
our lives seemed poles apart...
she has the kind of life i desire to lead after i have undeniably turned a rotten apple...
she pinpointed that i lacked discipline...
i ought to be ashamed...
truly, time to grow up...

~

got scolded by mom when i reached home...
tried my best not to fight...
instantaneously brought me back to a conversation i once had with someone i used to call dear...
he was right...
i should take actions instead of trying to justify myself out of nothing at all...
often, i can't shut up...
my nature...
i hope i would learn well before i get married...
if i do get hitched in the future...

~

so many things to learn on a brand new day...
don't waste your life away...
don't waste your time...
time is so precious...